The Office [US] Transcripts
The Office: An American Workplace
2x22: CASINO NIGHT
Original Air Date (NBC): 4/MAY/2006
Writer: Steve Carell
Director: Ken Kwapis
Transcript by Nikki
Origincally transcribed for TwizTV - used with permission
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DISCLAIMER:
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"THE OFFICE" and other related entities are owned by NBC, blah blah blah
I do not own the characters in the story (if only)
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INT. THE WAREHOUSE
(Various workers are setting up tables)
Michael: (VO) Tonight, the Scranton Business Park is having Casino Night. And we are converting our warehouse into a full-blown gambling hall. And I know it's illegal in Pennsylvania, but, uh...
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: ...it's for charity. And I consider myself a great philanderer. It's just, nice to know at the end of the day I can look in the mirror and say, "Michael, because of you, some little kid in the Congo has a bellyful of rice this evening." Just...makes you feel good.
CUT TO RECEPTION
(Dwight walks in and proceeds to remove his coat revealing a tux underneath)
(Dwight hangs his coat up)
Dwight: Ahem.
(Jim walks to reception)
Jim: (to Dwight) Excuse me. How long is the, uh, wait for a table for two?
(Pam smiles)
Dwight: (spiteful) I would never, ever serve you. Not in a million, billion years.
Pam: It's a nice tux.
Dwight: I know. It belonged to my grandfather. He was buried in it. So...family heirloom.
(Dwight walks to his desk leaving Jim and Pam to ponder that statement)
CUT TO LATER AT RECEPTION
(Roy is at the counter talking to Pam)
Roy: So, what's the deal? We've gotta pay for our own drinks? That's lame.
Pam: Come on, it'll be fun. And besides, I'm a roulette expert.
(From his desk...)
Dwight: Impossible. Roulette is not a game of skill. It is a game of chance.
Jim: I can always kind of win at roulette.
Dwight: Oh, really? Mm-hmm.
Jim: Yeah.
Dwight: How would you do that?
Jim: Mind control.
Dwight: (scoffs) You can't be serious. (off of Jim's serious face) Are you serious?
Jim: Ever since I as a little kid, like eight or nine, I could sort of control things with my mind.
Dwight: I don't believe you. Continue.
Jim: It was just little things, you know. Like I could make something shake. Or I could make a marble fall off the counter. You know, just little things.
Dwight: Heh! That's ridiculous. You know what? Uh...why don't you move that coat rack? (points to the coat rack behind reception) Excuse me, everyone! Attention in the office, please! Jim is about to prove his telekinetic powers. And he needs absolute silence. (everybody ignores him) Go ahead.
Jim: Okay, I'll try.
(Jim turns toward reception and sighs)
(He then takes a stance of concentration)
(The camera zooms to reception as Pam watches the coat rack)
(Slowly, the rack starts to move back and forth)
(Pam looks at Jim with surprise)
(Dwight is dumbfounded)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF PAM
(A straight faced Pam holds up an umbrella with a hook)
(She grins broadly)
CUT BACK TO RECEPTION
(Pam looks at Jim and winks)
(Jim smiles and pretends to concentrate harder)
Dwight: Oh, my God.
CUT TO INTRO WITH CREDITS
INT. THE RECEPTION AREA
(Dwight is at reception casually checking his messages)
(When Pam looks away, Dwight quickly checks the coat rack for invisible strings)
CUT TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
(Michael is talking on the speaker phone)
Micheal: I try not to think of it as lagging behind. It's more of a David and Goliath thing.
Jan: (on speakerphone) Well, the fact of the matter is, that your branch is currently number four of the five branches that I oversee and...
Michael: Top 80%. (looks at the camera and laughs)
Jan: Michael...
Michael: Yep?
Jan: You know that I'm very serious here.
Micheal: Jan, listen. I promise I will kick it up a notch. Baam!
Jan: What?
Micheal: Emeril. Oh, actually, um, while I have you-- Not that I have you or have ever had you. But, we're having our Casino Night tonight, and I think everyone would love to see their fearless leader here.
Jan: I thought that you were their fearless leader?
Michael: I am, but your are the Eva Peron to my Cesar Chavez.
Jan: (laughs) I, um, think you can handle it...
Michael: Oh, come on...
Jan: ...probably, Michael.
Michael: Come on! It'd be-It'd be fun. I can-I can hear it in your voice. You need a break.
(long pause)
Jan: Goodbye, Michael. (hangs up)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: Jan and I understand each other. The romance thing is sort of on hold for the time being. Be we're-we've remained good friends. Good friends with privileges. Not now. Someday.
CUT TO THE OFFICE AREA
(Michael is sitting on the reception counter addressing everyone)
Michael: Okay, everybody. Tonight's event is to benefit the Boy Scouts of America.
Oscar: Again. We do that every year.
Michael: Well, they need our money. They don't have cookies like the Girl Scouts.
Oscar: It'd be nice to do something for people who are actually suffering.
Michael: Well, Oscar, if you don't like it, then you should concentrate on winning. Because the person at the end of the evening with the highest chip count will receive $500 to donate to the charity of their choice. AND, they will get a mini fridge compliments of Vance Refrigeration. (Phyllis smiles) So, get your charities into Pam. I, for example, am playing for Comic Relief.
Jim: That doesn't exist anymore.
Michael: Comedy's very much alive, as are homeless people.
Pam: No, they stopped making that show.
Michael: Well, then they need our money more than ever.
Angela: You have to pick an approved, nonprofit organization.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF CREED
Creed: There's a great soup kitchen in downtown Scranton. Delicious pea soup on Thursdays. I'll probably give the money to them.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF KEVIN
Kevin: Something with animals. (beat) Or people.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF KELLY
Kelly: Kobe Bryant has a foundation and he is so hot. And he gave his wife the biggest diamond ring. I know he didn't do it. (thinks about it) Maybe he did it.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF ANGELA
Angela: We are giving money that has been gambled. Why don't we just deal drugs or prostitute ourselves and donate that money to charity?
CUT BACK TO THE OFFICE
Michael: (happy) Oh, and another fun thing. We, at the end of the night, are going to give the check to an actual group of Boy Scouts. Right, Toby? We're gonna-
Toby: Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's, uh, you know. There's gambling and alcohol. (Michael's face falls) And it's in our dangerous warehouse. And it's a school night. And, you know, Hooters is catering. You know. Is that-is that enough? Should I keep going?
(Looong pause as Michael stares at Toby)
Micheal: Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not, that way. I hate, so much about the things that you choose to be.
(Toby is quiet)
Michael: Okay, you know what? I will not donate my winnings to Comic Relief. Since, apparently, it doesn't exist. I am going to donate to Afghanistanis with AIDS.
Jim: Whoa, I think you mean the Aid to Afghanistan.
Michael: No, I mean Afghanistanis with AIDS.
Phyllis: Afghani.
Michael: What?
Phyllis: Afghani.
Michael: That's a dog.
Pam: No, that's afghan.
Michael: That's a shawl.
Dwight: Wait, canine AIDS?
Michael: No, humans with AIDS.
Creed: Who has AIDS?
Jim: Guys, the Afghanistanannis. (grins)
Michael: Okay, you know what? No, no. AIDS is not funny. Believe me, I have tried.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: There are certain topics that are off-limits to comedians. JFK. AIDS. The Holocaust. The Lincoln assassination just recently became funny. "I need to see this play like I need a hole in the head." (laughs) And I hope to someday live in a world where a person could tell a hilarious AIDS joke. It's one of my dreams.
CUT TO LATER AT RECEPTION
(Jim is picking up his messages)
Jim: What are you doing?
Pam: Oh, nothing.
(Pam is looking at a box of video tapes)
Jim: (reading a tape) "Till Death Do Us Rock."
Pam: They're wedding bands.
Jim: Oh.
Pam: Roy was supposed to pick the band, be he's concentrating more on the bachelor party now.
(Pam starts to put the box under her desk)
Jim: Wait, wait, where are you going? I mean, even if you don't hire a band, you still have to watch the bands. (picks up a tape) Pam, these are people who have never given up on their dreams. I have great respect for that. (Pam laughs) And yes, they're all probably very bad. And that'll make me feel better about not having dreams.
Pam: There's a KISS cover band in here.
(Jim mocks surprise)
Jim: Let's do it.
(Pam laughs as she takes the box of tapes to the conference room)
Pam: (VO) I'm pretty happy these days.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF PAM
Pam: I'm getting married soon, and I'm getting along with everybody at work. (smiles and shrugs)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF JIM
Jim: Why did I talk to Jan about transferring? Well, you know...
(Quick cut of a flashback of Jim when he was at the corporate offices)
Jim: ...I have no future here.
CUT TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
(Michael is talking to Darryl)
Michael: I have already put down the deposit. Do you understand how a deposit works?
Darryl: Mike, I am not having fire eaters in a paper warehouse.
(Dwight enters the office)
Michael: It's Casino Night. Like Las Vegas. There are fire eaters all over the place.
Darryl: Except my warehouse.
Michael: Well, actually, it's my warehouse.
Dwight: Actually, it's owned by Beekman Properties and Dunder Mifflin is four years into a seven-year lease.
Michael: (to Dwight) Why are you here?
Dwight: When Darryl was coming, you said you wanted me here for protection.
Michael: N-N-- I said, not that.
Darryl: We just have a lot of stuff down there that could be stolen.
Michael: That's ironic.
Darryl: What?
Michael: That you are afraid.
Darryl: Why? 'Cause I'm from the hood?
Michael: Dinkin' flicka.
Darryl: (sighs) Dinkin' flicka.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF DARRYL
Darryl: I taught Mike some, uh, some phrases to help with his interracial conversations. You know, stuff like "fleece it out," (tries not to smile) "going mach five," "dinkin flicka." (tries not to laugh) You know, things us Negroes say.
CUT BACK TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
Michael: Gimme some.
(Michael and Darryl engage in the dorkiest handshake)
Michael and Darryl: (making a circle with their fists) Oooop!
CUT BACK TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF DARRYL
Darryl: (laughing) Oh, yeah. I taught him a handshake too.
CUT TO DWIGHT'S DESK AREA
(Dwight is staring at his bobblehead)
(Suddenly he puts his hand up trying to move it with his mind)
(He gives up)
(Then he closes his eyes and tries one more time)
(Quickly he looks around to see if anyone was watching)
CUT TO THE CONFERENCE ROOM
(Jim takes a tape out of the VCR player and pops another one in)
Jim: Wow. I don't know how you're gonna decide. They are all extremely good.
Pam: I think I should hire them all. Do like Lollapalooza.
Jim: Yes.
Pam: Have three stages. Yeah.
Jim: Your mom would love that. (Pam laughs) She would.
(Music starts playing from the television, "Don't Stand so Close to Me" by The Police)
Jim: Now this band is called Scrantonicity.
Pam: Okay.
Jim: Let's take a look. (starts bobbing his head) Nice.
Pam: Oh, wait! That's Kevin. On the drums.
Jim: What?
Pam: On the drums! On the drums!
Jim: Oh, my God! That's Kevin. (Pam laughs) Great song, Kev. Oh, my God. He's the drummer and the singer.
(Pam starts to move to the song)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF KEVIN
Kevin: We really don't do a lot of weddings. We actually don't play in public very often. We're all really hoping that Pam's wedding works out. This could be a turning point for the band.
CUT BACK TO THE CONFERENCE ROOM
Jim: Wow. Oh!
(The video takes on a cheesy, polarized effect)
Pam: Oh my...
Jim: Yeah, you haven't seen that since 1983.
(Pam laughs as she points at the television)
Jim: That is amazing. Okay, we have to sign him. (gets up) I'm gonna call the label-
(Jim walks towards the door)
Pam: No, no, no! Come back. (playfully pulls his arm)
Jim: Hey, you're gonna lose him to another wedding.
Pam: (laughing) No, no, no! (tries to close the door)
Jim: (yells out the door) Kev!
(Pam manages to close the door while still pulling on Jim's arm)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF PAM
Pam: Jim is great. Being with him just takes away all the stress of planning my wedding.
CUT TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
(Michael's phone rings, he answers it on speakerphone)
Michael: Yes?
Pam: (on speakerphone) Michael, Carol Stills for you.
Michael: Who?
Pam: (OS) Carol Stills.
Michael: Do I know a Carol Stills?
Pam: (OS) Your realtor.
Michael: Oh, yeah. Put her through. Hey, Carol, how goes the real estate biz? Is it REAL good?
CUT TO RECEPTION
Pam: (on the phone) Still me.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF PAM
Pam: Sometimes I don't put Michael through until he's already said something. I look at it as a practice run for him. He usually does better on the second attempt.
CUT BACK TO RECEPTION
Pam: Carol, you're on with Michael.
Carol: (oh speaker phone) Hello, Michael.
Michael: Hi, Carol. How you doing?
CUT TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
Carol: I'm great, I just needed one last signature for your mortgage insurance.
Michael: Oh, hey. No probelmo. Incidentally, I love the place.
Carol: Oh, great.
Michael: Great, had a little bit of a weird smell. It's okay. At Christmas, the tree helped.
Carol: Oh, good. I'm glad. Um, can I drop it over later?
Michael: Um, actually, I'm sort of hosting this charity thing in our warehouse. Casino night.
Carol: Oh, great.
Michael: Yeah. It'll be good. A-You know what? Why don't you come by? Bring the papers. I'll sign 'em. And then you can stay and have a drink...
Carol: To the casino thing?
Michael: Yeah, it'll be fun. What do you-
(Michael's other line starts ringing)
Carol: Um, what?
Michael: Oh, I'm sorry. Can you hold on?
Pam: (on speakerphone) Michael.
Michael: Yes?
Pam: Jan's on line two.
Michael: Okay, put her through. Jan Levinson, I presume?
CUT TO RECEPTION
Pam: It's still me. Uh, Jan, here's Michael.
CUT BACK TO MICHAEL'S OFFICE
Jan: Michael?
Michael: Hey, Jan. How you doing?
Jan: You know, I-I thought about it, and you are right.
Michael: I am?
Jan: I could use a little fun. So I am going to drive up for your Casino Night.
Michael: Uh, o-kay. (is a little stunned)
Jan: Incidentally, what is the charity?
Michael: (without thinking) AIDS.
Jan: Okay then. I will- I'll see you tonight.
Michael: Okay, sounds great.
Jan: Bye-bye.
Michael: Bye. (switches lines) Uh, hello, Carol? Sorry about that. I just-
Carol: No, problemo. (laughs)
Michael: (laughs) Right. Um...I-
Carol: To answer your question...
Michael: Yeah.
Carol: Yes.
Michael: What?
Carol: I'd love to go.
Michael: Okay.
Carol: I have to get a sitter, but that shouldn't be a problem.
Michael: (starts scratching his head) Problem, good.
Carol: And I'll bring the papers too.
Michael: Good. All right. Sounds great.
Carol: Well, I'll see you tonight.
Michael: Bye.
Carol: Bye.
(Michael hangs up and thinks about his situation, then looks at the camera)
Michael: Two queens on Casino Night. I am going to drop a deuce on everybody. (for those of you who don't know this slang phrase, ask your parents, or go look it up)
CUT TO THE WAREHOUSE, CASINO NIGHT
(People are at the tables playing, having fun)
(Pam wins at one table)
Pam: Oh, my God!
Roy: Ah! Ha ha!
(Jim looks over)
(Offscreen we hear Roy kiss Pam)
Roy: (OS) Mwah!
(The camera spots Michael in the crowd and starts to follow him)
Roy: (OS) That's great.
(Michael walks over to Carol, who just entered)
Michael: Hey, hey. Hey, Carol.
Carol: Hi!
Michael: You look great.
Carol: Thanks. Thank you for inviting me. It looks so great in here.
Michael: Well. Just...(kisses Carol on the cheek)
(Carol looks at Michael, a little confused and unsure what to do)
(Michael sees this and awkwardly kisses her other cheek)
Michael: That's how we do it in the paper biz. It's European.
Dwight: Michael.
Michael: And...(Dwight walks up)...yes? Ah, Dwight!
(Michael kisses Dwight on both cheeks)
(Dwight looks at Carol and smiles then leans in close to Michael)
Dwight: (quietly) Codename ReMax is here. (looks at Carol) No sign of Lan Jevinson. (takes off)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF DWIGHT
Dwight: I'm Michael's wingman. I've got his back. Two dates. (smiles) He's got two dates tonight. (laughs, then gets serious) My job is to keep Jan away from Carol. And vice versa. Michael said, "We must deceive them, so as not to hurt them, and in that way, we honor them." (nods as he looks at the camera)
CUT BACK TO MICHAEL AND CAROL
Michael: Can I get you a drink? The food is from Hooters.
Carol: A drink would be good.
Michael: Okay.
CUT TO A GAMING TABLE
(Creed is talking to a guy and manages to distract him)
(He then pockets some of the guy's chips)
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF CREED
Creed: Oh, I steal things all the time. It's just something I do. I stopped caring a long time ago.
CUT TO THE OFFICE BREAKROOM
(Creed has his hand in the vending machine)
Creed: (VO) You should see how many supplies I've taken from this place.
(Creed gets a candy bar out of the machine and proudly holds it up for the camera)
Creed: Honestly...
CUT BACK TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF CREED
Creed: (happily) I love stealing things.
CUT TO ANOTHER GAMING TABLE
Woman: I'm going to get a drink. Do you need anything?
Billy: No, I'm fine. Thanks, sweetheart.
(if you don't remember who Billy is, refer to Episode 2x12,"The Injury")
(Michael walks up to Billy)
Michael: Billy, your nurse is hot.
Billy: That's my girlfriend.
Michael: Your nurse became your girlfriend? Sweet.
Billy: She was never my nurse. I met her at Chili's. She was my waitress.
Michael: Chili's is great. (not knowing how to get his foot out of his mouth, Michael walks away)
(Billy just stares straight ahead)
(Michael walks to the head of the warehouse and starts his announcements)
Michael: (loudly) Willkommen. Bienvenue. And welcome to Monte Carlo. (throws some noise-making snaps on the ground)
(He manages to startle some people)
Michael: (annoyed) Dwight! (the lights dim) I am no longer your boss. (pulls out some light sticks) Lady Fortune is your boss. (starts waving the light sticks around)
Stanley: (in the background) Will Lady Fortune give me a raise?
Michael: Shut it, shut it, shut it. Will Lady Fortune be your mistress? Only time will tell my friends. Leave all your preconceived notions about casinos at the door. Old friends. New lovers. (Kelly looks at Ryan, who looks away) And the disabled. (Billy looks around perturbed) Welcome all! Great, okay. Shuffle up and deal. (the lights come back on) Let's get it started. (to the camera) Black-eyed crows.
Dealer: Okay, the game is no-limit Texas Hold 'Em. Good luck, everybody.
(The dealer passes out the cards)
(Toby looks at his and sees two Jacks)
Dealer: (to Michael) That's at least four red chips to you, sir.
Michael: (serious) All in.
Carol: Oh!
(Everybody folds)
Michael: (VO) Bluffing is a key part of poker.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: Which is too bad because I am not very good at bluffing. (can't hide his smile) Did you believe me?
CUT BACK TO TO THE POKER TABLE
Toby: I'll call.
Michael: What are- That's insane.
Toby: I have good cards.
Michael: Well, Toby, I went all in on the first hand. So doesn't that tell you that I might have good cards too? So, don't be stupid. Just take it back.
Dealer: I'm sorry. He can't, sir. He's gone all in.
Michael: Okay, all right, whatever.
Dealer: Flip 'em.
(Toby flips his cards over)
(Michael angrily flips his cards over)
Michael: You really scr-, you really screwed that up.
(Michael scoots his chair out and walks away)
Oscar: Way to go Toby.
Meredith: Wow.
(Toby happily collects his chips)
Toby: (VO) I don't really play cards...
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF TOBY
Toby: ...but I'm not gonna lie to you. It felt really good to take money from Michael. Gonna chase that feeling.
CUT TO ANOTHER POKER TABLE
Phyllis: That's the normal question.
(Dwight is concentrating on the cards)
Dwight: (VO) I expect to do very well tonight.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF DWIGHT
Dwight: I have an acute ability to read people. Jim, for instance...
CUT BACK TO THE POKER TABLE
Dwight: (VO) ...has a huge tell.
(Jim looks at his cards, then looks around)
Dwight: (VO) When he gets a good hand, he coughs.
Jim: (coughs twice) Uh, I will raise.
(Dwight tosses in his cards, looks up, and sighs defeated)
(The dealer hands all the chips to Jim)
Jim: Thanks.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF JIM
Jim: It's the weirdest thing. Every time I cough, he folds. (makes a face)
CUT TO ANOTHER PART OF THE WAREHOUSE
(Carol walks up to Michael)
Carol: Wow, bad luck.
Michael: Ah, yeah, whatever. Hey, you know what? If luck weren't involved, (to camera) I would always be winning. (looks to the side and sees Jan) Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Jan: Michael?
Michael: Jan.
Jan: Hi.
Michael: Look, okay. I think we're all adults here. And it has always been my understanding that we have an open relationship.
Jan: What are- wait. What are you talking about?
Carol: Uh, what does that mean?
Michael: After you said you weren't coming, I invited Carol to come. And I don't think that I did anything wrong.
Jan: (confused) No, no you didn't. Hi, I'm Jan. I'm Michael's boss.
Carol: Hi.
Jan: Does anyone want a drink?
Carol: Uh, no, I'm good.
Jan: Okay. (walks to the bar)
Michael: Heh, um...
(Dwight runs up to Michael)
Dwight: Hey.
Michael: Hey-what?
(Dwight kisses him on both cheeks)
Dwight: (quietly) Jan's here.
(Dwight looks at Carol and walks away)
(Carol tilts her head at Michael and looks at him confused)
CUT TO THE CRAPS TABLE
(Dwight is the shooter)
Dwight: Give me the dice.
Bob Vance: Come on, Dwight. It's on you, baby.
(Angela walks up to Dwight)
Angela: (casually) Good evening, Dwight. What is this?
Dwight: Evening, Angela. This is craps. I need to roll an eight. If I do, everyone wins.
Angela: Then roll an eight.
Dwight: (small grin) Thank you Angela.
Angela: Good luck, Dwight.
(Dwight throws the dice and rolls an eight)
(Everybody at the table cheers)
Dwight: Yeah! Yeah! (grabs Angela and kisses her on the cheek) Mwah!
(Angela slaps him and walks off)
(Dwight looks at her shocked)
Bob: That's good stuff
Kevin: Dwight, let's keep it going. Let's keep it going.
(Angela tries to hide her smile as she walks away)
Bob: Let it ride. Let it all ride.
(Dwight slowly smiles too, then turns back to the table)
Dwight: Gimme the dice.
CUT TO A POKER TABLE
(Only Jim, Pam, and Kevin are at the table)
(The dealer puts down his last card)
(Pam looks at her cards, smirks and tries to play it off)
Jim: Yeah, right.
Pam: "Yeah, right," what?
Jim: What was this? (imitates Pam's eye roll)
Pam: (laughs) I have good cards.
Jim: Really?
Pam: Mm-hmm. And I'm going to take you all in.
Jim: Wow. (Pam puts all her chips in) I think you're bluffing.
(Pam shrugs)
(Jim playfully squints his eyes at her)
(Pam can't hide her glowing smile)
(This makes Jim laugh)
(Jim conceds and puts in all his chips)
Kevin: Yeah, I think she's full of it.
(Jim smiles at Pam)
Pam: (quietly and genuine) Sorry. (flips her cards) Straight.
Jim: Aw. (flips his cards) Three nines.
(Everybody starts clapping)
Kevin: Jim Halpert, ladies and gentlemen.
Jim: Thank you very much. It was fun.
(Pam smiles at Jim as she collects her chips)
CUT TO THE BAR
Jan: (to the waiter) Cosmopolitan, please.
Carol: (to the waiter) Can I get a red wine? (to Jan) So, uh, so two hours. That's a long drive.
Jan: Well, it's part of the job. You know, keep an eye on things. So...why not?
(They both laugh awkwardly at each other)
Jan: (glances at the camera) So, how long have you and Michael been, um-
Carol: Oh, ah, well, actually, um, I guess this would be our first date, I guess.
(In the background Michael spots the two ladies talking, and quickly walks the other way)
Jan: Casino night in the warehouse. Good sport.
Carol: Well, I'm having a nice time.
Jan: Oh, me too. Me too. (sips her drink)
CUT TO ANOTHER CASINO TABLE
(Creed is standing by a guys who just happens to look away)
(Creed steals some of his chips)
CUT TO THE BAR
(Jim is stirring his drink)
Ryan: (to the waiter) One beer, and one 7 and 7 with eight maraschino cherries, sugar on the rim, blended if you can.
Jim: So, that's still going on, huh? You and Kelly?
(Ryan let's his defeated face speak for him)
CUT TO THE CRAPS TABLE
(Michael is the shooter)
Michael: All right!
Dealer: Point is four! Shooter roll a four. Come on shooter!
(Everybody is cheering)
(Michael has the dice and holds then up to Carol)
Michael: (to Carol) Blow! Blow for luck. (Carol obliges) Yeah! (stops) Also you. (to Jan) Not playing favorites. (Jan does nothing) All right, here we go. Yeah!
Dealer: Five.
(Everybody is disapointed)
Michael: Aw, so close, so close.
Dwight: Come on. (to Jan) So, uh, where are you staying, Radisson?
Jan: What?
Dwight: Super 8?
Jan: No, I-
Dwight: Motel 6?
Jan: I-
Dwight: Best Western?
Jan: I didn't, I don't-
Dwight: Holiday Inn? The Hyatt in Wilkes-Barre? (Jan looks the camera) Are you staying with Michael? (Jan looks at Dwight)
Michael: (OS) All right!
CUT TO ANOTHER POKER TABLE
(Kevin looks at his cards, the camera zooms in on his gold, bling-bling, watch)
Kevin: (VO) I won the 2002, $2,500...
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF KEVIN
Kevin: ..No-Limit Deuce to Seven Draw Tournament at the World Series of Poker in Vegas. So, yeah. I'm pretty good at poker.
CUT BACK TO THE POKER TABLE
Kevin: (confidently) All in.
Phyllis: (giddy) Okay, let's do it.
Bob Vance: Good luck, honey.
Phyllis: Oh, thank you Bobby, but it doesn't matter. It's just fun to play.
Kevin: Three queens.
Dwight: Nice. Very nice.
Phyllis: I have an Ace.
Oscar: No, that's a flush.
Dwight: Oh man!
Phyllis: I have a flush!
Bob: Yes!
Phyllis: Look, I won. Look, I have all the clovers.
(Kevin looks severely disapointed)
Phyllis: (OS) You want to play again?
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF KEVIN
Kevin: I suck.
CUT TO THE BAR
(Kevin is nursing his wounds with a beer)
Roy: She took you down, huh?
Kevin: I do not want to talk about it.
Roy: Hey, I, uh, saw your tape. Your band, Scrantonicity. You guys rock.
Kevin: Yeah?
Roy: Yeah, you guys want to play our wedding?
Kevin: Awesome. Did Pam say it was okay?
Roy: Whatever. I'm in charge of the music.
Kevin: Dude, you will not be sorry.
(They bump fists)
Roy: Sweet. All right. (pats Kevin on the back as he leaves)
Kevin: All right. (smiles at the camera)
CUT TO OUTSIDE OF THE BUILDING
(Jan is leaning up against a car smoking)
(Jim walks out)
Jan: Smoke?
Jim: No, thanks. (leans on the car next to her) You, uh, having fun?
Jan: (sarcastically) Fabulous time. (matter-of-factly) I drove two and a half hours to get here.
Jim: Yeah, we all really--
Jan: Left work early, drove down here. And I-I-I am completely underdressed.
Jim: I think you look great.
Jan: (sighs)(regretfully) Why did I hook up with Michael?
Jim: Yeah, why did you?
Jan: It was very late, Jim. Very...very late and, uh...Have you given any more thought to the transfer?
Jim: Oh, yeah.
Jan: Good.
Jim: Mm-hmm.
Jan: Have you told anyone?
Jim: No.
Jan: Well, you should.
CUT BACK TO THE CASINO
(Creed is standing next to Angela at the roulette table)
(When the dealer looks away, Creed steals some chips in front of Angela)
(Angela looks at Creed)
CUT TO ANOTHER PART OF THE CASINO
Bob: (on the microphone) Uh, excuse me. Uh, big moment. The, uh, evening's chip leader and winner of this beautiful mini refrigerator courtesy of Vance Refrigeration. Creed Bratton, Dunder-Mifflin.
(Creed shakes out some chips from his sleeve as he makes his way to the front)
(He shakes Bob's hand)
Creed: Thanks, I never owned a refrigerator.
(Creed picks up the fridge and walks away)
(Confused, Bob starts to clap)
CUT TO OUTSIDE OF THE WAREHOUSE
(Roy is in his truck, Pam is standing by the driver's window)
Roy: Sorry babe, I am just beat.
Pam: It's okay. I'll see you at home.
Roy: Okay. Hey, don't try to lose too much money, all right?
Pam: Okay.
Roy: In case you still want a honeymoon.
(Pam laughs as Roy starts the truck)
(Jim is walking by the building on the other side of the truck)
Roy: Hey, Halpert! Keep an eye on her, all right?
Jim: Okay, will do.
Roy: See you.
Pam: Bye.
(Roy leaves)
Pam: Hey.
Jim: Hey, how's it going?
Pam: Good. Especially after I took all your money in poker.
Jim: Ha-ha, yeah. Uh...hey, can I talk to you about something?
Pam: About when you wanna give me more of your money?
Jim: No, I wa-
Pam: Did you wanna do that now?
Jim: Well-
Pam: We can go inside. I'm feeling kinda good tonight.
Jim: I was just, um...
(Pam smiles, and waits for Jim to say something funny in response)
Jim: (honestly) I'm in love with you.
Pam: What?
Jim: I'm really sorry if that's weird for you to hear. But you needed to...hear it.
(Pam breathing starts to pick up)
Jim: Probably not good timing. I know that, I just--
Pam: What are you doing?
(Jim gives the slightest head tilt/shrug as if to say, "Come on, you know.")
Pam: What do you expect me to say to that?
Jim: I just needed you to know. Once.
Pam: Well, I, um- I...(inhales deeply)...I can't?
Jim: Yeah.
Pam: You have no idea...
Jim: Don't do that.
Pam: ...what your friendship means to me.
Jim: Come on. I don't wanna do that. I wanna be more than that.
Pam: I can't.
(Jim's eyes start to tear up)
Pam: I'm really sorry if you misinterpreted things. It's probably my fault.
(A tear rolls down Jim's cheek)
Jim: Not your fault. I'm sorry if I misinterpreted that...(wipes the tear)...our friendship.
(Jim walks away)
(Pam stands there, shocked, fiddling with her ring)
(She looks down at her ring)
CUT BACK TO THE CASINO
(Jan walks up to Michael and Carol)
Jan: Hey. I'm leaving.
Michael: Hey! Okay.
Jan: So, I just wanted to congratulate you on a fantastic evening. Did the company proud. (laughs)
Michael: Thank you.
Jan: And, uh, thanks for inviting me. You were right, I needed it. So thanks.
Michael: Okay. Thanks for coming.
Jan: (to Carol) Nice to meet you. And, uh, you guys have a, have a good time together.
Michael: Okay, talk to you Monday.
Jan: Yep.
Carol: Buh-bye.
Michael: Goodnight. She's a good boss.
Carol: She seems really nice.
Michael: Oh, she's great.
CUT TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: Love triangle drama. All worked out in the end though. The hero got the girl. Who saw that coming? I did. And Jan is really happy for me.
CUT TO PARKING LOT
(Jan is hurriedly walking to her car)
Michael: (VO) So actually the hero got two girls. He got the girl that he works with, and he got the girl that he buys real estate from.
(Jan gets into her car and spots her overnight bag on the seat)
Michael: (VO) So, I've got my New York girl and my local flavor.
(Jan, angrily throws the bag behind her seat)
CUT BACK TO INDIVIDUAL SHOT OF MICHAEL
Michael: Life is good.
CUT TO THE OFFICE
(The office is dark except for a few lamps)
(Pam is leaning against Jim's desk talking on the phone)
Pam: (on the phone) About ten minutes ago. (beat) No, I didn't know what to say. (beat) Yes, I know. (beat) Um, I don't know, Mom. He's my best friend. (beat) Yeah, he's great. (beat) (trying not to break) Yeah, I think I am.
(In the background, we see Jim walk in, head down)
Pam: (spots Jim) Um, I have to go.
(Jim spots Pam and starts walking towards her)
Pam: I will. (hangs up phone) Listen, Jim--
(Jim puts his arms around Pam and presses his lips to hers)
(Pam bring her arms up to protest, but starts to kiss him back)
(Her hands make their way to the back of his head)
(She starts to pull away, Jim kisses her one more time)
(Pam finally separates herself from Jim)
(Jim takes a small step back)
(Silence)
(They look, quietly, at each other)
THE END